Leverage Transcripts derived from the closed captions available online and formated by slaysvamps. Feel free to download and share, but please give credit and a link back to me here.
Leverage Main | When Darkness Falls

5x08 The Broken Wing Job

[Tokyo, Japan]

(Nate watches Eliot grab a guard and pull him behind a pillar. He listens to sounds of Eliot beating up the man and waits for Eliot to come out into the hallway)

Eliot: Told you there was a ninth guard.

Nate: Yeah, yeah, I owe you a beer.

(Sophie enters the hallway holding a monkey statue)

Nate: Hey. How’s the curator?

Sophie: Left wanting more.

Eliot: Oh.

(Hardison enters the hall holding a box that makes monkey noises)

Hardison: And then the one without the fur says, “get your paws off.”

Nate: No, Hardison, Hardison, Hardison.

Hardison: Uh, we’re -- we’re bonding.

Nate: Hardison, no.

Eliot: Six minutes, Hardison.

Hardison (hands the box to Nate): Yeah. (walks away)

(the box shakes and the monkey inside screeches)


[Equipment Closet, Tokyo]

(Hardison moves wires on network equipment)

Eliot: Three minutes.

Hardison: Yeah. Be a lot easier if I wasn’t Andre the giant over here in Japan. I feel like I’m 6’12”.


[Leverage Headquarters]

Parker: Three minutes. I’ll keep mark.


[Tokyo]

Nate: Parker, we agreed you would stay off the comms.


[Leverage Headquarters]

Parker: No.


[Tokyo]

Nate: Yes.


[Leverage Headquarters]

Parker: Look, I sprained my knee. I’m fine! (repels down from ceiling into a chair) Ohh! (painfully) Totally fine.


[Equipment Closet]

Hardison: Babe, sprained your knee? You tore your ACL.


[Leverage Headquarters]

Parker: Yeah. Basically, a sprained knee.


[Equipment Closet]

Hardison: Yeah, basically not true. Look, babe, six weeks of bed rest. Doctor’s orders. Not optional. And don’t forget to take your pain pills, okay?


[Leverage Headquarters]

Parker: They make everything go wibbly-wobbly. (grabs a bottle of orange pop and opens it)

Hardison: Yeah, that’s how you know they’re working.

Parker: But I got to be sharp... on the edge. It’s where I got to be. Can’t have nothing in my life I can’t walk away from in 30 seconds if I feel the heat coming around the corner.


[Equipment Closet]

Hardison: Parker, look, I know that you’re... Wait, hold up, babe, did you just quote “Heat”?


[Leverage Headquarters]

Parker (chuckling): Yeah, that’s where that’s from. Ha, watched your Netflix queue... Twice.


[Equipment Closet]

Parker: Think I’m going stir-crazy.

Hardison: You think?

(equipment begins to beep as it begins to fry)

Hardison: You— (blows on the equipment) no, stop. (blows harder) Okay, uh, babe, I’m sorry. I got to go. Mayday, mayday, mayday.


[Leverage Headquarters]

Hardison: Babe, love, kisses, snuggles.


[Equipment Closet]

Hardison: Other romantic verbs. Take your pills, be nice to Amy. Look, we’ll be fine without you. (blows on equipment


[Leverage Headquarters]

Parker: Yeah. That’s what I’m afraid of.

(sometime later Parker is sitting at a bench fiddling with electronics)

Amy (entering): Good morning. How’s the patient feeling today?

Parker: Less and less like a patient and more and more like a prisoner.

Amy: Uh, well, hopefully, this will taste better than prison food.

Parker: Eh, you’d be surprised. Best meal I ever had was in French prison. (sighs) La Sante.

Amy: French prison, huh? How long were you in for?

Parker: (in French) Not as Long as they thought I’d be. (in English) You know, we don’t have to do this every day.

Amy: Well, Hardison asked me to look after you. And though he’s your boyfriend, he is my boss, so, yeah, we do kind of have to do this every day. And, trust me, it beats dish duty.

Parker: What’s this?

Amy: A “get well soon” bear.

Parker: Ah. Does it do anything cool?

Amy: Besides promote good health?

Parker: Yeah, you know, like walk or talk or anything?

Amy: No.

Parker: Oh. ‘cause Hardison usually builds me robot friends, so...

Amy: Yeah, well, this one cost like 10 bucks. If you need anything else, I’ll be right around the corner. (takes away old dishes)

Parker: Thanks.

(Parker begins to eat, looking at the bear. Later, she sits in a chair flipping television channels on the screen. Tim passes as she tries to occupy her time)

Parker (to robot): And then, this one time... I know. Isn’t it? (begins crying)

Man: Step four, then take the arm up.

(Parker attempts to follow the directions)

Woman: Couple more times up. Now pull it across your body. Good, good. And down.

Man #2: Roll your dough out from the center, just like...

(Parker shuts a book, obviously irritated)

(Woman on television screams. Parker looks at her pill bottle, then at the bear. She begins changing the channel, then offers the remote to the bear)

Parker: Oh, what? You want to choose? Okay, fine. But no “B.J. and the Bear” And no reality dating shows... Except “Beauty and the Geek.” I like that one. Oh, what? You’re gonna sulk now? Okay, fine. I’m just gonna keep choosing, then.

(Parker changes channels, and finds Hardison’s security camera feed)

Parker: What’s this? Ah, brew pub. Didn’t know I had Hardison’s security-camera feed.


[Brew Pub]

(Amy moves through the pub carrying a tray of food)

Bartender: Hey.

Amy: Hey. How you doing?

Bartender: All right.

Amy: Busy, huh? God.

Bartender (hands Amy a flower in a vase): Here you go, Amy.

Amy: Aww, this is so pretty. I love flowers.


[Leverage Headquarters]

Parker: What have we got here? Let’s see.

(Parker changes focus to various a couple sitting at a table where a man is laughing)

Parker: Hmm. Nothing is that funny. (to bear) Am I right?

(Parker changes focus to another table where a couple is sitting)

Parker: Ah. (high-pitched voice) If you leave that seat up one more time, I’ll just scream. (laughs, deep voice) Baby, I sometimes worry that I’m just too much of a man for the world and for you. (high-pitched voice) My mother warned me about you. (deep voice) What you don’t know about your mother is, she leaves the seat up, too. (normal voice, to bear) She leaves the seat up, too, like... Get it?

(Parker changes focus to a table with two men, who are going over what looks like plans on a notepad)

Parker: Who are those guys? Huh.

Amy (entering with a tray of food, including vase of flowers): Is that the brew pub? So this is what you do back here.

Parker: No. Maybe. It’s boring not being able to walk.

Amy: Oh? That’s okay. I like to people-watch, too. Check it out. (sits next to Parker, showing her a notebook with sketches of people) I call him Sid... And I call her Nancy. You know, like the sex pistols?

Parker: They don’t seem too happy.

Amy: Well, Nancy thinks Sid is cheating on her, but she doesn’t have any proof. (points to a woman on screen) Oh, she’s Juliet... (points to a man on screen) And he is Romeo. Both serially single, braving the rough seas of internet dating.

Parker: Hey, you know, these are really good. No, I’m serious. These are really good. Trust me, I’ve seen some of the best.

Amy: Thanks. I wish you could tell my father that, though.

Parker: Well, has he seen these?

Amy: No. He has never seen any of my artwork. Doesn’t stop him from having an opinion about art school, though.

Parker: What, he’s not a fan?

Amy: Not of any degree that doesn’t have an “m,” a “b,” or an “a” in it. He wants me to take over the family business.

Parker: And what is the family business?

Amy: What isn’t the family business? Oh, you see that guy? (points at screen) He always orders the same thing every day -- Chicken parm. And then he takes one bite of it and then sends it back to the kitchen.

Parker: Hmm. What a jerk.

Amy: No, no, no, no, no, no. It’s not like that. He’s never rude. I think he’s just... sad.

Parker (points to table with two men): What about those two? Know anything about them?

Amy: Not much. They’re pretty pushy about where they sit, though. I guess they like the view. The bald one is “V”, and the scruffy one is “K.”

Parker: What do you mean?

Amy: What they call each other.

Parker: How do they tip?

Amy: Uh, always cash. I know that. But... (thinks) I guess they must be average tippers.

Parker: Because you would remember if it were high or if it were low.

Amy: Exactly. (checks watch) Yeah, I got to go make my trash run. My favorite. Enjoy your lunch.

(Parker focuses on screen, pulls up past footage)

Parker: Mm-hmm. Tuesday. Okay, “V” and “K”, what are you up to? All right.

(Parker continues to watch the screen, observing the two men and their behavior)

Parker: Four coffees?

(Parker watches one of the men take two ‘to go’ cups out of the pub)

Parker: How long have you guys been at this?

(Parker pulls up more past footage where the men do the same things all the time She progresses to the point where she’s writing notes on the board)

Parker: Who are you guys? (thinks, writes ‘thieves’ on the board) You guys picked the wrong brew pub.

(Parker types on a keyboard)

Parker: Okay, let’s hear what you’re talking about.

(a message appears on screen warning that there are no microphones in the pub)

Parker: Aw, come on. (looks at bear) What? Don’t give me that look. What, like, it’s my fault we have thieves running around our house and he has no audio contingencies?


[Tokyo]

(Eliot sits meditating with his eyes closed when his phone rings)

Eliot: Parker.

Parker: Hey, what are you doing?

Eliot: I’m waiting. How’s the knee?


[Leverage Headquarters]

Parker: Ah, driving me to crazy town. Pretty much like it’s on cruise control, cruising me through crazy town. And you know what? Let’s face it. I have way too much to do. This knee—I need to be on a bullet train through crazy town. I don’t have time to stop for gas, go to the museum.


[Tokyo]

Eliot: Parker, breathe. Identify your limitations. Turn them to advantages.


[Leverage Headquarters]

Parker: Okay, good. How do I do that?


[Tokyo]

Eliot: Adapt. I got to go.

(behind Eliot, a shadow looms on the wall)

Parker: Wait, wait, wait. Eliot—

(the shadow pulls a katana and Eliot opens his eyes)


[Leverage Headquarters]

Parker (sits up): Okay, adapt. Adapt. Can’t use my leg... So I’ll use someone else’s.

(Parker enters Hardison’s lab with the vase of flowers and begins going through Hardison’s equipment)

Parker: All right. Where are you, little buggie? (finds a bug and holds it up) Aha. (empties all the water from the flower vase and attaches the bug) Uh-huh.


[Brew Pub Back Hallway]

(Amy passes with tray of food. Parker holds out the vase of flowers)

Amy: Oh, no, no, no. Those are for you.

Parker: No, for table 5. (sits the flowers on the tray and closes Employees Only door)

Amy: Okay. Table 5.


[Leverage Headquarters]

(Parker makes her way back to watch Amy’s progress on the display)

Parker: Ah. Chicken parm. All right, I got a good feeling about today. (watches Man at bar on display) Eat it. Eat it, you crazy old man.

(Man tries food, doesn’t like it, stops Amy as she walks by)

James: Oh, I’m sorry, miss.

Parker: No, leave her...

James: Could you please send this back to the kitchen? (hands her his plate of food)

Amy: Oh, I’m sorry, sir. Is something wrong?

James: It’s just not... right. Sorry.

(Amy takes the food back to the bar, grabs a carafe of coffee and the flowers and walks toward table 5)

Parker: Focus.

Amy: Can I get you boys a refill?

(V holds up his hand and Amy places the flowers on the table)

Amy: Excuse me.

Parker (to bear): Did you see that? He’s afraid to make eye contact. Very suspicious.

V: It’ll be headline news. So we’ll have to disappear for a few months.

K: All those zeros in my bank account should take the sting out of anything.

V: We’ll have to be on the lookout.

Amy (returns with carafe of water, gestures toward flowers): Poor little guy looks thirsty.

Parker: What? No, no, he is not thirsty. He’s fine!

(Amy pours water in the vase and an alert pops up that the microphone is off line)

Parker: Ohh. Amy, you kidding me? The water on the bug?


[Brew Pub]

(Nancy looks at her phone which shows a message of “Can’t make our date. Sorry.” She puts the phone down sadly and watches as Amy approaches with a drink)

Amy: On the house.

(Nancy smiles, then looks up when a shower of dust falls from the ceiling)


[Heating Duct]

(Parker crawls awkwardly through the ductwork)

Parker: Oh! Aah! Ooh. Aah. Okay. Oh, maybe Hardison was right about those pain pills.

(she stops above the table with the two men and looks down through a grill)

Parker: Oh. Yeah, okay. All right. Okay. All right. All right. All right.

(Parker carefully feeds a microphone down toward the table, leaving it just above the light before securing it in place)


[Leverage Headquarters]

Parker: Let there be sound.

K: I got to rig this up. (refers to papers) We’ll bootleg off a VHF wavelength reserved for truckers. There’s no heavy routes near this zip code, so we should be cool.

Parker: What is this, amateur hour? That’ll never work.

V: That’ll never work.

Parker: What’d I say?

V: Cloud cover is too low this time of year. We can’t risk being overheard. We stick to burners. Do not screw this up.

(Parker notes that V is the mastermind)

K: I’m not. Geez. Why do you keep saying that?

V: Because I need it to get through your thick head.

K: It’s gonna be fine.

V: Fine ain’t good enough for this.

(later, Parker sits eating with an ice pack on her knee. She watches the display, where every table has a vase of flowers)

Parker: That should be enough bugs to cover the whole bar.

(on the display, Amy gives James his food)

Parker: As usual, chicken parm. Wait for it.

(James takes a bite of his food)

Parker: Mm-hmm. Wait for it.

(James puts his silverware down, obviously disappointed)

Parker: Yep. Same as always. Don’t get you.

(Parker zooms in on James’s hands where he is caressing his finger, where there is a white ring)

Parker: Hmm. (focuses on table with two men)

V: All right. So, we’re gonna be here.

Parker: What is that?


[Brew Pub]

V: About 20 minutes to the freeway.

K: Looks straightforward enough.

V: Quick, clean, and we’re out.

K: Set for life.


[Leverage Headquarters]

Amy (at another table): Did you order yet?

Parker: Come on, move. (focuses again on the two men) Ooh. Ah. (they are not speaking) Whatever.

(Parker zooms in on the map on the table, looking at an area that is circled)

Parker: Hey, that’s our corner they circled. (pulls up map on the display) Okay, so... what’s the target? Bank... Pawnshop? The jewelry store. (pulls up a photo of the jewelry store)


[Flashback]

Amy: They’re pretty pushy about where they sit, though. I guess they like the view.


[Leverage Headquarters]

Parker: So, that’s why you like the view. You’re casing the jewelry store across the street.

(K leans back revealing a gun tucked in his waistband)

Parker: Whoa. You brought a gun? To my bar?

(later, Parker fiddles in Hardison’s lab)

Parker: Ah. Okay. Clone! (gestures toward device) Clonus clonius!

(the device does not work)

Parker: I did what you taught me. It’s still not working.


[Tokyo]

Hardison: Remind me again. Why are we building a pinch phone? You’re supposed to be resting.


[Leverage Headquarters]

Parker: It’s a long story.


[Tokyo]

(behind Parker, a man hangs a ribbon around Sohpie’s neck)

Hardison: Okay, look, babe, I’m on. Did you remember to solder the green wires together—


[Leverage Headquarters]

Hardison: —clear the system cache, flush the B.I.O.S. memory?

Parker: Yep, yep, and, uh, no. (presses a button) Ah! It worked! Ah! You’re the best.


[Tokyo]

Hardison: You know how I do, baby. Got to go. (hangs up and goes to join Sophie on stage)


[Leverage Headquarters]

Amy: Okay, you want me to what, now?

Parker (hopping around the bench): Those guys are gonna rob this store, right? Which is fine. I don’t mind robbers who aren’t robbing me or my friends or kids or... But they brought a gun to the party, and that changes all the rules. (holds up the cloning device) This doohickey will send me the data from their phones so we can figure out what their plans are and stop them.

Amy: They have a gun. We don’t stop them. We call the police.

Parker: No cops. (hands Amy the device) No cops. That will actually increase the chances of people getting hurt. (hops over to her crutch)

Amy: Uh, how?

Parker: Because seeing a uniform in the middle of stealing something could cause you to panic, make bad decisions.

Amy: And how do you know so much about this again?

Parker: I... read blogs... Amy. We don’t need cops. We don’t need anyone, especially if they don’t need us! Then we really don’t need them.

Amy (laughs): We? Okay, up until now, it’s been me taking orders, (sets device down on counter) and suddenly we’re a “we”?

Parker: Okay. (takes device to Amy) Look, I know I’ve been a little bit bossy, but I really hate this... asking-for-help thing. But I really do need your help.

Amy: What—why should I?

Parker: Because that’s what you do. I’ve seen your résumé. Volunteer work, charity efforts. Of all the people who work here, do you think Hardison really picked you at random? No. He knew you were one of us.

Amy: Okay, “one of us”? What does that mean, “one of us”?

Parker: People who have to help.

Amy (sighs and holds out her hand): Just... push this button here or whatever?

Parker: Yeah, just get on right up to their table, and press the button.

Amy: Okay, I got to ask. Is any of this illegal?

Parker (scoffs): Absolutely not.

Amy: Okay.

(watches Amy on the screen)

Parker: You can do this.


[Brew Pub]

Amy: I can do this. (approaches two men) How about a warm-up? (spills coffee on table) Oh! Sorry. (reaches for napkins to clean it up)

V (grabs her hand): I got it.

(Amy puts her hand in her pocket and pushes the button)


[Leverage Headquarters]

Parker: That-a-girl.

(windows begin popping up on the screen showing everyone’s phone information)

Parker: Whoa. Whoa, whoa, whoa. What’s happening? Everybody’s phones... Uh, maybe just a quick peek. Okay, Sid, let’s see if you really are cheating on Nancy. (pulls up Sid’s phone) Oh, that’s not Nancy. Ew. Sid. I knew it! You’re such a dog! (pulls up Juliet’s phone) Hmm. Juliet.

Woman: I was excited you picked this place.

Parker: Huh. (pulls up Romeo’s phone) And Romeo. Did you know that you both love Daft Punk and play the violin? Hmm. Chicken Parm. (pulls up James’s phone) Voice mails.

Larry: Hi, James. It’s Larry at the hospital.

Parker: “James.” It’s Chicken Parm.

Larry: We, uh -- we just heard about Emma. My God, I’m so sorry. We’re all so sorry. (another message) Hey, James, it’s me. Uh, just checking in. If there’s anything you need, just call, okay? The service was beautiful. I just wanted to let you know, We shifted your surgeries to Dr. Phillips, but we could really use you back here, buddy.

(Parker watches James sitting sadly at the bar)

Parker: Hmm. (pulls up V and K’s phones)

Amy (entering): Did it work?

Parker: Oh, yeah.

Amy: Whoa.

Parker: Uh-huh. All right, so we’ve got no voice mails, no e-mails, No photos, but there is a lot of texting, especially from this one person named “O.”

Amy: What about all the numbers?

Parker: I don’t know. At first, I thought it was some sort of transliteration code, but nothing obvious is sticking out as a match. And they switch to English every time they order coffee.

Amy: Oh, that’s what the coffees are for. The “V” guy always leaves, takes two coffees to go, and walks them somewhere.

Parker: Where?

Amy: I-I don’t know. I mean, I’ve never really thought about it until now.

(on screen, another coded message comes in)

Parker: Oh, oh, excuse me.

Amy: What?

Parker (gets up and hops across the room): Ugh. Ohh, ohh, ohh, ooh. Ow.

Amy: What are you doing?

Parker (holds up bug): Not me. (hands bug to Amy) You.


[Brew Pub]

(Amy places the bug on the bottom of one of the coffee cups a Server takes it over to the two men)

Server: Two coffees to go. Thanks, guys.

(V gets up and takes the coffees out of the pub)


[Leverage Headquarters]

(Amy rejoins Parker)

Parker: Good job.

(they watch V’s location on a map on screen)

Amy: Okay, wait. If this is us and that’s them, then are they where I think they are?

(both women look toward a back wall of the building. Parker changes the security camera to show the alley, but there is nothing unusual to be seen)


[Exterior Alley]

(Parker limps outside and looks around a corner to see V giving the coffee to someone in a van. The plate has a quick release and the tires are duelers, immune to spikes. The handicapped license plate allows the vehicle to park anywhere

V: I’ll see you. (walks away from the van)


[Leverage Headquarters]

Parker: Yeah, so, there’s a getaway van parked in the alley.

Amy: How do you know that’s what it is?

Parker: Intuition.

Amy: Oh, that’s what the numbers are! They’re timing splits, like in track and field. I was a miler for like five minutes at St. Tristan’s prep, in high school. Okay, divide a distance into legs. See? Each number is accumulated time at the end of each leg, so the first leg is 2 minutes and 10 seconds, and the second leg is 60 seconds, which means the total time now is 3 minutes and 10.

Parker: What’s the first number?

Amy: I don’t know. I’ve never seen that before. Oh, shoot, I got to go make the trash run. I’ll be right back.

Parker: No, wait. Garbage truck comes at 2:30 every day, right?

Amy: Right.

Parker: What if that’s not the only truck on a schedule? (pulls keyboard to her) First number is clock time. Every day at 2:30 P.M., an armored truck pulls up. Moving cash from store to truck, always a weak point. That’s when and where these guys are gonna strike.

(‘Greenlight’ pops up on the phone displays on screen)

Parker: In other words... right now.

(the men continue to sit at the table talking)

Amy: What’s happening?

Parker: I don’t know. Truck’s here. They’re bird-dogging. That’s it. 60 seconds. We got to move. (moves away from the counter and hits her leg) Ow! Ow, ow, oh! Ugh, ugh, ow.

(Amy comes over to help)

Parker: Oh. I’m fine. (shrugs off her help) I got it, I got it, I got it. I got it. I’m fine. (nearly falls) Ugh!

Amy: Oh! Okay, tell me.

Parker: Tell you what?

Amy: You know what to do, and I know how to walk. No offense. So let me be your legs.

Parker: It could get scary in there.

Amy: I get it.

Parker: Okay. (hops back to the counter)

V: We’ll go over it another thousand times if I say so. ‘cause we have one shot. Just relax, man.


[Brew Pub]

Bartender (hands Amy a pitcher of tea): Here you go.

Server: You guys want to sit at the bar?

(Amy moves through the crowd)

Nancy (showing picture on phone): Don’t tell me that’s not you.

Sid: Keep your voice down.

Nancy: Why? You don’t want everyone knowing what a cheating bastard you are?

Sid: Come on, look, just ‘cause somebody sent you a photo, That doesn’t mean --

Nancy: You!

Sid: Doesn’t mean --

Nancy: You sent me the photo.


[Flashback]

(Parker sends Nancy the photo from Sid’s phone)


[Brew Pub]

(Nancy is walking out. Sid goes to intercept her)

Sid: Hey. Hey, hey, hey.

Nancy: Who were you trying to send it to -- your buddies, her? If you want people to see it so badly, how about we post it on the internet?

Sid: Oh, come on. Give me the phone.

(V stands and walks toward the door, Amy watching, then following)

Sid: Give me the phone. Give me the phone!

(Sid begins struggling with Nancy. They fall into Amy, who dumps the tea on V)

Amy: Oh, my God! Oh, my God, I am so sorry!

V: It’s okay.

Amy: No, please, please, let me -- Let me get something to clean it up, please.

V (holds up his hand): It’s fine. (leaves the pub)

Sid: Look, I swear to God, babe, it’s not me. It’s not me!

Nancy: Don’t you ever touch me again. (walks out)

Sid: Babe! What -- huh? (follows her)


[Leverage Headquarters]

(Parker sighs, watching the armoured truck pulling away. On screen, ‘No Joy’ is texted between the two phones, then ‘Abort’. Amy enters the room)

Parker: Well, good news is, they’re properly flummoxed. But bad news is, we have to wait 24 hours and we got to do it again.

Amy: Wait a second. You didn’t say anything about them coming back.

Parker: Well, of course we want them to come back. How else are we gonna catch them?

Amy: W-we don’t. We’re gonna call the cops.

Parker: Normally, I would agree with you, but what we’ve been doing here -- not super legal.

Amy: Oh, I knew it!

Parker: Just think of it as more charity work.

Amy: Okay, but my other charity work doesn’t involve having a gun pointed at me.

Parker: Exactly. That’s what I’m saying. Oh, you meant that as a bad thing.

Amy: You’re really serious. You think we can do this.

Parker: I do. Look, these guys aren’t that good, which is actually another reason why we should do this, ‘cause sooner or later, they’re gonna make a mistake. Someone’s gonna get hurt. Look, if we don’t catch them, we’re letting that happen.

Amy: So, what’s the plan?

(Parker smiles)


[Brew Pub Back Hallway]

Parker: Yeah, and I know you’re really busy, but this part is really your kind of thing more than it is my kind of thing. So, I mean, how would you handle these thieves?

Nate: Sorry, Parker, you’re breaking up. Who’s jeeves?

Parker: Uh, thieves.

Nate: Bees?

Parker: No! Thieves!


[Tokyo]

Nate: Listen, Parker, whatever it is, I’m sure you’ll figure it out. I have faith in you.

Parker: So, I mean, what –

(Nate hangs up and sits down beside Sophie in a romantic setting)

Sophie: How’s she doing?

Nate: Apparently, dealing with some thieves.

Sophie: Aw, baby bird is learning how to fly. Oh. This place certainly served us well.

Nate: Yes, it did.

Sophie: Go ahead. Light it.

Nate (lights a match): Are you sure?

(Sophie nods. Nate throws the match at the fireplace where a fire swells)


[Brew Pub]

Parker (looking around the pub): Armored truck pulls up, thieves hit it. Getaway van is in the alley. Fastest way to the alley—our pub. That’s what the splits are for. First split is from the truck to our front door. Second split is the time it takes to get through the restaurant. (to Amy) All right, gonna need tables here, here, and here. But don’t seat anyone at them. We just want to slow them down, not get someone hurt.

Amy: Right, I’ll just tell them we’re short on servers. We do it all the time when we don’t feel like working. (catches herself) And you’re dating the boss.

Parker: You guys think of him as the boss?

Amy: Well, yeah, because that’s what he is.

Parker: Yeah, guess so. Is he a good boss? Do you—you guys like him?

Amy: What, are you kidding? He’s awesome. But don’t take this the wrong way. He is way too smart for this place.

Parker: I agree. He’s the smartest man I’ve ever met, and I’ve known some very smart men.

Amy: And I asked you about a brother, right?

Parker: Twice.

Amy: Oh, we should sit Romeo and Juliet together and see what happens.

Parker: Oh, my God. That’s genius!

Amy: It is?

Parker: No, no, not what you said. What I thought of. But inspired by what you said.


[Leverage Headquarters]

Amy: So, you’re going to set up Romeo and Juliet with each other?

Parker: No. I have an even better match.

(pulls up the dating profiles of Romeo, Juliet and two others on the screen)


[Brew Pub]

(Parker is at the bar as Amy picks up the to go coffees)

Amy: Here you are. Two coffees to go.


[Exterior Alley]

V: Here you go. All right, drink up. 2:30, all right? You guys be ready. Cool?

Thug: You got it.

V: Go ahead. See you soon.


[Leverage Headquarters]

Amy: Hey. I want to make the trash run early so I don’t miss the you-know-what. You have any?

Parker: No, but hurry back, ‘cause look who just showed up. Romeo and Juliet’s dates.

Romeo: Oh, hey.

Olivia: Oh, hi. How are you?

Romeo: I think you’re looking for me. I’m Howard.

Olivia: I’m Olivia.

Romeo: Nice to meet you.

Olivia: Nice to meet you, too.

Romeo: Have a seat.

Parker: 2:30 sharp!


[Exterior Alley]

(Amy carries the trash out of the back door of the pub and places it in the dumpster)


[Leverage Headquarters]

(Parker watches the screens, sees ‘Go’ texted between the phones)

Parker: No, no, no. No “go.” No “go.” you’re 20 minutes early. (tries to get up) Ow! Oh! Oh, ow. Ugh. (grabs crutch) Ugh. Ugh!


[Brew Pub Back Hallway]

(Parker limps toward the pub and looks at the empty table. Through the window she can see that there is no armored truck at the jewelry store. She turns quickly, thinking)


[Flashback]

(V looks out the window as Amy carries the trash past him. He watches her reflection in the window as K returns from the bathroom)

Amy: He wants me to run the family business.

Parker: And what is the family business?

Amy (scoffs): What isn’t the family business?


[Brew Pub]

(Parker checks Amy’s family on her phone)

Parker: Her father’s worth a billion dollars. (she limps quickly toward the back of the pub)


[Leverage Headquarters]

(Parker pulls up various cameras on the display)

Parker: Let’s watch it.

(one camera shows Amy running from K through the kitchen)

Parker: It’s not a robbery. It’s a kidnapping.

(on screen, V and K have Amy penned in)

Parker: Amy.


[Exterior Alley]

(V and K carry Amy toward the van)

Amy: No! No! No! Let me go! Let me go! No! No! No! No! No!

(V opens the van and they throw Amy inside, closing the doors. The two men run to the front of the van to find the driver and passenger sleeping)

V: What the hell?! (slaps the driver, trying to wake him) Hey, “O”!

K: What, long night?

V (examining O): No, something else.


[Flashback]

Hardison: And don’t forget to take your pain pills, okay?

Parker: They make everything go wibbly-wobbly.

(Parker dumps pills into the to go coffee cups)


[Exterior Alley]

V: Screw them. They get left behind.

(V pulls driver from van. Parker looks around the corner, then approaches the back of the van)

Amy: Help! Help! Somebody call the police!

(Parker quickly unlocks and opens the back doors)

Parker: Shh, shh!

(Amy gets out and they head back toward the back of the pub. V sees them in the side view mirror)

V: Let’s go.

(V and K check the back of the van to find it empty)

K: Hey, let’s just get out of here, man.

V: Not without the girl.


[Leverage Headquarters]

Amy: Oh, my God.

Parker (holding Amyu): It’s okay. It’s all right. You’re safe now, okay? Just maybe next time, mention that the family business is multinational.


[Kitchen]

(K and V walk through, V pulling the fire alarm)


[Brew Pub]

Man: Is that the fire alarm? What is that?

Olivia: That’s the fire alarm. Everyone outside.

Jack: Let’s Go.

Olivia: Keep moving. Let’s go. Come on.

(a server runs into Juliet, knocking her into Romeo)

Romeo: Whoa! Hey, hi.


[Flashback]

Amy: She’s Juliet, and he is Romeo.


[Brew Pub]

Juliet: Thank you.

Romeo: I should have probably let your date do that. (gestures toward Jack, who is directing people out the door)

Juliet: How did you know he was here with me?

Romeo: I notice things.

Juliet: About me?

Romeo: Who wouldn’t?

(they smile at each other)

Romeo: Come on.

(Romeo and Juliet exit)

Olivia: Come on. Keep moving. Don’t panic.

(K and V enter from the back. Olivia sees them and gestures them toward the door)

Olivia: Hey, guys, come on. Hurry, hurry, hurry. (sees the gun in K’s pants) Whoa. Gun. (pulls her own gun) Portland P.D. Drop your gun.

(Jack moves up beside her with his own gun)


[Flashback]

Amy: You gonna set them up with each other?

Parker: No. I have an even better match.

(display shows that both Olivia and Jack are Law Enforcement)


[Brew Pub]

Olivia: Stay where you are. (to Jack) Check the alley. Call for backup. I’ve got these guys.

Jack (exiting pub): Dispatch, we need backup.

(K lifts his arms and moves threateningly toward Olivia)

Olivia: Stay where you are! Stay where you are. I will shoot.

(V shoots at Olivia, hitting her in the side. She screams and falls)

V: Lock the door.

(K doesn’t move)

V: Hey, you, move!

(K moves off to lock the door. James approaches, V turns the gun on him)

V: Stay where you are!

James: Oh, hey, I’m just a doctor. I’m just a doctor. I’m not leaving. Let me just get—(moves around V) just get to her. Just—It’s okay. I’m just gonna be right—right here. (takes off jacket and kneels beside Olivia) Okay, all right. I’m a doctor. It’s gonna be okay. (puts his jacket beneath her head) Why don’t you help me, there.

(V kicks Olivia’s gun away)

K (returns): Cop’s locked out. We got three minutes, four, tops. We got to find her fast.

V: We ought to... (looks around, sees security cameras everywhere, then the doors to the back room) I think I know how this thing went sideways.


[Leverage Headquarters]

Amy (watching display): What does that mean?

Parker: It means things are about to get a whole lot worse.

(a few minutes later V and K enter the empty room to find the security camera displays on screen)

K: What the hell’s going on?

V: Shut up!

(the lights go out)

V: You think that scares us?! You’re in way over your head!

(V hears the sound of a struggle and a body hitting the floor)

V (whispers): K! K?

(V moves around the room nervously, then fires the gun several times. Parker hits him, knocking his gun away. She moves away to turn on the light and they both look at the gun lying on the floor between them. After a moment, they both go for the gun)

Amy: Parker!

(Amy tosses the crutch at Parker, who uses it to keep the gun away from V. They fight and she uses the crutch to knock him out)


[Brew Pub]

James (to EMTs): Thank you.

EMT: Yeah. Okay. You’re welcome. (EMTs leave)

(Police escort V and K from the pub)

Parker: Hey. Hey, wait.

(V and K turn to look at Parker, who walks up to V)

V: What?

Parker: I’m gloating.

(Police take the two men away)

(the next day, James enters the pub, surprised to find it empty)

Amy: Nice to see you today.

James: How are you doing?

Amy: Good. Regular spot?

James: Yeah. Where is everybody?

Amy: Eh, slow day. I’ll get you some water. I’ll be right back.

James: Thank you.

(James sits down and Parker sits next to him, smiling. There is a bit of awkward silence)

James: Do I know you?

Parker: Oh, I, uh, work in the back. I was here the other day when you saved that cop’s life.

James: Just glad I was here.

Parker: Well, foof. I’m sure that cop’s happy we serve a chicken parma.

James: Yeah. I guess I order a lot of that.

Parker: Yeah, you do. Um, you know, something tells me there’s a story to that.

James: Mm, my wife... before... even at her sickest, she’d make it for me. She insisted. Said, uh, making me happy made her feel better.

Parker: Well, she would have been proud of you... the way you stepped up the other day.

James: Hmm. Thank you.

Parker (nods to Amy): You know what we’re gonna do? We are gonna find you a new favorite dish. What do you say?

(servers place half a dozen dishes on the bar in front of James.)

James: Whoa. Sheesh. Whoa. Well, thank you.

(Amy brings over several glasses of wine)

James: No fish. I don’t like fish.

Man: Okay, no problem.

Parker (lifts a glass to toast): To new friends, new food, and no fish.

James: No fish.

Amy: No fish.

(they drink)

Parker: Mmm. Start with Eliot’s chili. It’s the best.

Amy: Can we have some silverware?

Bartender: There you go.


[Leverage Headquarters]

(Amy and Parker are watching horror movies and eating popcorn as the others approach)

Eliot: Can’t believe that snow monkey didn’t bite you.

Hardison: Told you, man, we connected.

Eliot: No, he hated you.

Sophie: I think you’re thinking of Emperor Akihito and you.

Eliot: He didn’t hate me. He just didn’t want me around his granddaughter.

Hardison: Shocking.

(they enter the room and Eliot mutes the television)

Parker: Hey. You guys remember Amy?

Hardison: What’s up?

Amy: Hi.

Hardison: Hey, babe.

Parker: So, how was Japan?

Nate: You know, boring.

Eliot: Japan.

Sophie: Boring.

Hardison: Japan was Japan.

Sophie: Nothing really going on.

Nate (eyes the bullet holes in the walls): How were things here?

Parker: Fine. Same. Boring. Like Japan.

Hardison: You know, I don’t believe you. (points at Amy) And, you, you’re a part of this. See this—all this? It’s not just any zombie movie. This the original zombie movie. Babe, it’s on Blu-ray. How is it possible to be bored? You know what we’re gonna do? We’re watching this from the beginning, because, obviously, you’re doing something wrong.

Eliot: I’m in.

Sophie: Sure. Why not?

Nate: Maybe a little more popcorn?

Amy: I’ll get some.

Nate (softly to Parker): Nice job while we were away.

(Parker smiles)

The End

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